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Friday, 31 May 2013

The Moment Of Choice



It's not the moments when you're amazing and seen to be amazing that you decide where your life will go.

It's not when you're standing on a stage, nailing a performance, or putting the finishing touches to your masterpiece, or laughing off a wonderful compliment from an adoring fan.

It's when you're on your own, and nothing makes sense, and everyone you know is looking at you with contempt and ridiculing you, and all the reasons why you ever thought you could do anything of value sound hollow and pointless even to you.

When you're on your knees, in the dark, and it hurts, and every part of you is screaming out, stop, give up, lower your expectations, accept a reduced future, fall back in line, stay with the crowd.

When your mind is giving you all the excuses you ever need to never hope for better, to abandon a better future and settle for a safe one.

That's the moment you decide where your life will go.

One more step.  That's the decision.

2 comments:

  1. "Make the choice in your strongest moments that limits your choices in your weakest times."

    And when you're down there, on the ground and on your knees, and nothing has gone right and everything you've worked your life for has fallen apart, the question that will ring out is "What sustains me?"

    And if you place your hopes, your dreams, your life upon a bedrock that is solid, upon something real, then you'll find Ariadne's thread.

    But if you draw from ANYTHING other what's real, then the Lord have mercy on you. Because it will break you and bring you back to bottom again and again.

    ...

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  2. Yes, this is an extremely good point.

    If you're drawing your motivation from pretty stories you tell yourself, or from the promise of glory or riches, that works... for a time.

    But if you're trying to do something that is genuinely worth the doing, you will be pushed way beyond a place where things like that have any traction.

    It's not that they're 'morally wrong' or whatever. It's that they just don't have the substance, they just don't have the strength.

    When things get really dark, you turn to all your pretty stories, or the promise of riches, or whatever? And they just can't give you the motivation that you need to keep going.

    If you're doing something really worthwhile, you will get pushed to this point, over and over.

    Drawing motivation from the real might sound a little abstract, but all it means is this - that if you are doing something that is genuinely worthwhile, and potentially possible, those things do not go away when you lose your belief.

    And you can always tap them to keep you going.

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